Lots of Love

Today I am asking all my friends and family to keep a very special friend of mine in their thoughts and send tons of love and positive vibes her way. 

I have a very close friend with twin boys who were born just like my little babes, too soon and too small.  Although they are doing remarkable and are probably the cutest things you ever laid eyes on, a fear she's been waiting to confirm was confirmed today at a Dr.'s appointment.  One of the little boys has CP (Cerebral Palsy).  No one knows any details about it, how severe it is, or what's going to happen in the future.  All they know is some things may be harder for him than others.  He is doing tons and tons of wonderful amazing things and is a darling ball of love and chubs.  I have total faith he is going to overcome a lot of his challenges and do many remarkable things, even if he has to work a little harder than the rest of us!     

Ironically, her and I had our babies at 26 weeks gestation around the exact same time on different ends of the planet......  My babes 10/17 and hers on 11/1.  We have been friends since the beginning of our journeys ( a very scary one at that) as we met on a micropreemie support group.  We have experienced the same roller coaster rides of the NICU and all the fears and everyday task of being Momma's at home.  She has listened to me laugh, cry, yell, and joke many many times.  Not only do we discuss our children, challenges we've faced, and all our fears of the future, we also visit about everything else in between. She has been my best comfort and supporter at very very difficult times in my life, especially during Ella's final days. I don't know what I would of done without her listening to me and her kind words of wisdom.

We've always discussed how our little guys should be twins because they seem to develop at same pace and have the same troubles.  I seek a lot of comfort and assurance from her with Joe's challenges and I try to do the same in return.  I am not glad our little men have issues, but I am glad I have someone to relate too and hash it out with.

Going to Dr.'s appointments is one of the hardest things for us, because we know when something isn't right and usually have an idea about what it is.  When you hear it come out of your Dr.'s mouth it's so totally earth shattering.  I think it hurts so bad because you know they are right and that they aren't sugar coating the truth to make us feel better.  It feels like you and your child are being "sentenced for life" or something, but in any Dr.'s defense they just want to get to the bottom of everything so they can help you and your child the best ways possible.  Then you have to swallow that hurt and move ahead one day at a time never knowing what the future holds and being strong for your baby.  It's a very hard thing to deal with and sometimes it feels endless....... that more and more bad things are happening.

Please send tons of love and positive energy to her and the little guy as they have done for me so many times in the past when I felt scared of the unknown!  Fortunately for him he has an incredible parents to start his journey with!  No worries here from me, but sometimes life just gives us too much to swallow and we need a minute to feel sorry for ourselves dammit!